I am an otter

In this LGBT world and culture, there are certain things that catch my attention and make me smile. One of them is that about bears and other individuals, or whatever they are. The bears are men more or less big, stocky, more or less hairy, usually mature (over 40), normally with some facial hair and some overweight or muscle. These features are not very strict conditions though: one can be a bear without being fat or well built, without facial or body hair. But those are usually the most characteristic features of a bear (oh well, the name says it all, doesn't it?). 

However, although I include myself in this ursine community, I lack some things to be properly a bear. That's not a problem! Don't panic! There is enough for everyone. There are labels and all kind of animals within the group so everyone can fit. Depending on your physical appearance you can be: a cub, if you are still a young bear under 35-40 more or less; an otter, if you are slim and hairy and that's what I am (they say); a polar bear, if you are big and you have practically only white hair; a silver fox, if you have grey hair and are slim or with athletic built; a wolf, if you are furry and athletic; a bull, if you are muscled and thick; etc. And if you are none of these but still feel like being part of the community, then you are a chaser.

We normally have something in common: we are the gay anti-stereotype. Bears have (though not always) a naturally masculine behaviour. Most of us would never make you suspect that we are as gay as pink fluffy sleepers. This is good for those who want to hide their homosexuality, but a bit uncomfortable sometimes for those who don't. Sometimes you need to take someone, make him sit down in front of you and insist that you are homosexual even though you don't look like it (as if we homosexuals looked alike for the fact of being so...). Anyway, many times this leads to funny anecdotes, like it happened to me with some colleagues who wouldn't realise that there was no irony in some comments, but they are true. That if I play in a gay basketball team is not by chance. Another thing that they have in common is their sympathy and friendly approach despite the ferocious looks. The ursine community is very sociable. They are, after all, like teddy bears.

They say that "confess" that you like bears is like coming out of the closet for the second time. People can understand that you are homosexual and you like guys; there are many cute guys out there. But it is harder to believe that you'd prefer an affair with Richard Karn (for example) than with the glamorous David Beckham (I'm not saying that he's ugly, but not my type). I have felt most comfortable and identified among bears within the LGBT community. Like other sub-groups, we have our own flag, our specifically bears' bars, our parties, T-shirts, logos, art, comics, magazines, films (in Spanish and English), music (also in Spanish and English), internet series (a CSI parody filmed in Manchester for example), "beauty" pageants and other stuff about this topic including porn, of course. That doesn't mean that you have to like all these things just because it is for bears, but it is there. In fact, I feel sometimes a bit embarrassed for some things, but they all aim to have fun.

There is a sentence by my friend Ana, so philosopher, which perfectly sums up the spirit: "Bears' world is fascinating... You are young until you are 40, you don't have to wax, you don't have to shave, you can eat everything you want because it is ok to have a belly, with some simple jeans and a lumberjack shirt you look already great... I want to be a bear!".